Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
he was CRYING into my vagina
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
