Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Randomize