...so i touched it.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
