Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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