Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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