i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Randomize