scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
ttyl tear gas
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
