I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize