So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
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