have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
