Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
