i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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