Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Someone shit on the floor
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
