Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
