you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
smell my finger.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I'm really busy with my period
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