i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Watching her eat just hurts me
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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