just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
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