Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
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