Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
