i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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