FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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