I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I would fuck him just for his dog
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
Randomize
