My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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