I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
a search helicopter?!
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
You can't just leave with hair like that
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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