i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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