How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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