I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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