seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
