i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Drake has all the answers
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
