And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
