Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Randomize