i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
