marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize