Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
