She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
