After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
This is my life. Enjoy the view
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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