Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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