I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
