You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
