just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
