Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize