he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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