just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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