we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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