You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
