mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
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