he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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