your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
