I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
