The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize