can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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