the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
